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Tuesday, June 01, 2010

Wishfull Thinking

i left a note on my bed, the only way of explaining my intentions.. i'll never have the guts to say it to their face, so a written note would do.. after making sure that my bags were packed, i took a last look at my bedroom, for i noe that the next time i lay eyes on it, would be for a long time.. the cab was waiting outside, so i hurriedly went down n locked the door.. as i hopped on tha cab, i thought to myself, how things would change from now on.. i've made a drastic decision for once in my life that i noe will have a huge impact on several ppl especially my family.. on the way to the airport, i thought back on how i've come to make this decision.. it doesn't seem like me at all, but whut i do for a living doesn't quite satisfy me the way i hope my life would be.. i go on and on for days and weeks without really thinking much about whut i do.. so when news broke about the attack, and seeing ppl forwarding msgs or changing their profile pics at fb, i thought, that ain't gonna do nothing for them.. condemning actions are easy, i can say things, but to walk the talk is tough.. suddenly, i felt the urge to do sumthing productive.. something that i noe would make me happy by helping others.. only God noes how much i've been thinking about it but i always contemplate that without money, the only thing i could offer is energy and i havn't really done much about it.. of course i've thought about it a lot, but now i felt like it's time.. it's time to do something worthwhile.. and so i signed up for this organisation as an activist, went thruogh their training, n finally chosen to help out..

i arrived at the airport about an hour later and met up with a few frens i made along the way.. we board the plane and from then on, i knew there was no turning back.. we've come for a mission and i won't be coming back until my job here is done.. it was gonna be a long flight and even though i tried to rest my eyes, my mind wouldn't stop thinking about the possibilities..

back home, my family came back to an empty house.. eventually, my note will be read n i can imagine how their reactions will be.. but by then, i'll already be halfway to my destination.. i'm sorry for any disappointement or pain i caused, i never meant to be selfish..


unfinished shoty i did a while back.. posting this up on 29.11.2010.. it's been a while...