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Wednesday, February 25, 2009

fifteen

You take a deep breath and you walk through the doors 
It's the morning of your very first day
You say hi to your friends you ain't seen in a while
Try to stay out of everybody's way
It's your freshman year and your gonna be here
For the next four years in this town
Hoping one of those senior boys will wink at you and say
You know I haven't seen you around, before

Cause when your fifteen and
Somebody tells you they love you
Your gonna believe them
And when your fifteen feeling like
There's nothing else to figure out
Well count to ten, take it in this life before you know
Who your gonna be
At Fifteen

You sit in class next to a redhead named Abigail
And soon enough your best friends
Laughing at the other girls who think their so cool
We'll be out of here as soon as we can
And then your on your very first date and he's got a car
And your feeling like flying
And your mama's waiting up and your thinkin he's the one
And your dancing round the room when the night ends
When the night ends

Cause when your fifteen and
Somebody tells you they love you
Your gonna believe them
When your fifteen and your first kiss
Makes your head spin round but
In your life you'll do things greater than
Dating the boy on the football team
but I didn't know at fifteen

When all you wanted was to be wanted
Wish you could go back and tell yourself what you know now

Back then I swore I was gonna marry him someday
But I realized some bigger dreams of mine
And Abigail gave everything she had to a boy
Who changed his mind
And we both cried

Cause when your fifteen and
Somebody tells you they love your gonna believe him
And when your fifteen
Don't forget to look before you fall
I've found time can heal most anything
And you just might find who your supposed to be
I didn't know who I was supposed to be at fifteen

taylor swift

Monday, February 23, 2009

bottomline, i dun really trust men.. i dun trust them when they're with me and i dun trust myself when i'm with them..

p/s: i wish my grandfather was still alive so i can truly witness love as pure as it is..

Sunday, February 22, 2009

does music defines you?

sometimes, u can tell what kind of person an individual is by the songs they listen to.. i'm being a stereotype here when i say people who loves rock are usually rebel and live a rather wild life.. hip youngsters listen to r&b or maybe pop.. and lets not start about emo here.. usually, an image goes along with this.. rockers usually wear black, hip hoppers wear baggy clothes i guess, and those people with heavy eyeliners? take a guess.. so where does a universal person like me stand? i definitely love music and could accept almost all kinds of music.. i dun have an image to go with it cuz i hardly care about it.. so what does people see when they look at me? a girl who can't make up my mind? or am i so easily pleased?

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

i watch too much oprah

i think we need more self-respect..when u treat urself with more love and care, others will tend to do the same.. however, people don't always turn out the way we thought they would.. and so it may be crucial to get to know someone before letting them in.. but then, like one of my acquaintance once said "even after some time, how well will u noe someone".. and as much as i like to think that it'll take time, the truth speaks out by itself.. is there really a person who is willing to give their all to another? will they leave nothing left? not even a spot of privacy or secret that they like to keep to themselves, and forever cherish and burried together alongside their lifeless body? true, there may be people out there who are trusty enough to do so.. but is it worth it?

i, for one, always build a wall or even put on a mask whenever meeting people.. it's hard for me to really show people the kind of person i am, mainly because of the fear of being judge eventho i know people will still judge me otherwise..

so what is this all about? well, i think we should love ourselves more and dun expect much from others.. like what my cousin said during one of our 'deep talks', "don't depend on others n dun let others depend on u".. off course he was talking about general things, but i can't help but relate it to love too (trying not to get mushy here).. u can't really expect others to love u as much as u love urself.. or let them put u 1st ahead of themselves.. i mean, why should they rite? will u do the same? but mayb, if u let them noe, that u do matter, they will indirectly make u matter to them too.. and so supporting my previous note, that by treating urself better, others might do the same..

fingers crossed

Monday, February 16, 2009

starting the countdown

it's 8 am, and i'm already in college, excited that clses are now in session.. it's kinda weird to find myself anticipating this day, but i guess 2 months break was way too long for me.. it's good to go out and meet people again =b so here i am, in the comp lab so early in the morning.. cls will start at 10, so i'm having a 2 hrs head start on things.. will need to meet claudine later regarding my law subject which is no longer offered, so i need to ask her about emailing rowena to delete my minor, which i was looking forward to see on my certificate later on.. then i need to go to the bursary to get my money back.. too much hassle for the first day, but i guess i somewhat need it.. i went to bed around 1am last nite but was unable to sleep until 3am.. woke up at 6:30am this morning, which makes a total of 3hrs n 30mins of sleep.. i hope i won't have a nap afterwards since i'm hoping to sleep early tonight.. adjusting my sleeping hrs last week obviously didn't do the trick.. or mayb i wasn't that strict with myself.. hmm, i suppose that was it..

anyway, i'm very excited for cls to start.. it's kinda disturbing to think that nam yen and i are the only ppl from our intake left this sem.. i really do hope that we get through this sem n finally graduate.. at least there'll be familiar faces on our convocation.. so nuff said, fingers cross, n i'll be updating more soon enuff

cheers

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

i've learnt that...

the friends you make and the guys you attract, reflects what kind of person you are..

so who am i?

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

the thin line between good and bad

i wish i knew

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it's been awhile since i last blabbered about pointless stuff.. truth is, i wasn't really sure how to put in words whut i was currently thinking.. on the other hand, i no longer feel like pouring my heart out in this blog.. mainly because it feels like my privacy has been invaded by trespassers.. but then they won't be trespassers if i didn't allow them rite? nevertheless, i should just ignore these mere distractions and start writing anyway.. =p

so my question for today, is what really makes a person good? is it the intentions the initially have? the actions they take? or the outcomes of it? do u judge a person religiously, or merely as a human being in general?

i've never killed anyone, so am i good? i lie almost everyday in my life, so am i bad? sometimes, the things i do made me question myself..


i've faced a couple of situation where something bad happened n i chose to let it be without really voicing my opinion or rather disagree n try to prevent it from happening.. whut does dat say about me really? ignorant, that's it..